Soap timelines are always tricky. But there was some cosmic shift in time, space, and energy between Wednesday and Thursday's episodes. We didn't just fly to California, DC, and other parts unknown. We found a series of magical doors that were a true joy to open.
The first one was to see John and Paul's door! Yeah, Paul! How've you been, buddy? Tending to that magical fountain of youth, I see. Good on you.
John was there to ask if Andrew ever mentioned anything to Paul about Megan. Because... all ISA agents spill classified info over pillow talk. Paul confirms nothing about Megan but can confirm that he is a magical wizard of the universe because just by looking at a photo of Andrew on his phone, Andrew appeared at Paul's door! (Cut to me staring at a photo of new shoes on my phone. Come on, magic soap powers!)
Meanwhile, across the country, Uncle Steve knocked on door number two -- Andrew's ISA headquarters office! Andrew explained that Steve and John don't have clearance anymore because they might still be brainwashed. Plot twist! Though, if I saw their history with brainwashing, I'd have a hard time signing off on either of them getting a library card, much less top-secret clearance to the List of All Bad Guys.
Still, Andrew is a mensch and leaves to get a cup of coffee when Steve just "happened" to be in the room with the open laptop. A law enforcement officer who knows when to bend the rules will do well on soaps. I hope Andrew is here to stay.
With this knowledge, John and Steve hopped aboard the speeding jet to head to...um....somewhere else, where Megan used to live. But instead, they opened door number three and found Hope! Yes, it's really her! Oh, my goodness, it did my heart good to see these three together! Hope is a professional equal to these two. I loved that she shoulder-shrugged off her own royal brainwashing past and breezed on through the security clearance. I really missed her a ton!
And wherever there's hope...there's a Bo! Yes, he was behind door number four! Kate's awesomeness was on full display as she sassed her captor, knocked her out, and pranced right out of the room. She ran right into Bo, who was clearly brainwashed from the second we saw him. Bo's been a lot of things over the years, but conniving isn't one of them. Evil Bo should be fun to watch!
A few rapid-fire questions related to all this Megan drama:
She said that Kate was the guinea pig for "Phase 2" which may result in super strength. I have a pretty good feeling this is going to work, so I have to wonder -- is the world ready for a Kate with super strength??
Soap math is weird, but multiple characters mentioned Megan had someone on ice for ten years. Bo's only been gone since 2016. Even if we factor in the time jump, that leaves Bo on ice for eight. Considering they were so specific with and true to Stefan being gone for four years, is there someone other than Bo on the Megan Hathaway Medical Plan?
Marlena and Kayla found Dr. Rolf behind door number five. But is there someone else helping Megan out with the science stuff? Is there a Dr. Mrs. Rolf?
Can we keep Megan around? There's nothing wrong with a woman in her 60s still being obsessed with a man she met in high school -- to the point where she's calmly poisoning and kidnapping people. This is as close as we've gotten to a Stefano heir!
Sloan's big legal strategy of saying "please" worked, so Eric and Brady are off the hook for all kidnapping charges. But, still, no one can stand Sloan. Eric's strategy is to keep kissing her so she can't talk. This seems to be working well for him.
I love Maggie offering Xander a job at Titan. She's smart enough to consider the optics of her actions -- firing Alex on day one wouldn't have been great. But my bigger shock was learning Alex is the only other Kirakis who worked at Titan! That can't be right, can it? Is Justin at least still their legal counsel?
The whole Stefan vs E.J./Nicole plot is playing for laughs with me, and that's quite enjoyable. These are all extremely talented actors making a delightful meal out of this mess. Their take on the Friends "they don't know that we know that they know" storyline was comical. I think those cups were switched 18 times. And I'll gladly watch Dan Feuerriegel play the various stages of being drugged every episode.
And I would love to see this storyline lean in a bit more to their respective parents. Stefano groomed E.J. to be the heir to the DiMera Empire. But Vivian wrote and produced Stefan's introduction to Salem as the DiMera interloper. Someone please call Louise Sorel for some episodes because the Alamain side of Stefan is his best side. DiMera vs. Alamain is always a good time!
It's risky having Leo, Xander, Gwen, and Alex all in one storyline together because it puts me in the position of obviously, and without reservation, rooting for Xander to escape this quad. At least he's had more than a sniff of true humanity.
Alex actually used the words "consenting adult" to describe a blacked-out drunk Gwen. Yikes. Yo, Alex. When a girl doesn't remember what happened the next morning, you should be mortified, not proud. And you definitely shouldn't gloat? campaign? for your bedroom reputation.
To his credit, Xander told Gwen the truth. But Gwen hates the truth. It's like throwing water on a Mogwai. Bad things happen. She pitched an absolute fit and behaved a heckuva lot like the Gwen we first met -- from the "Gwen and Jake" era.
All that said, I actually do like the idea of Gwen and Alex together. She can call him out on his privilege in a way Stephanie never really could. I'm not opposed to them spending more time together. Plus, I want to know what text Gwen got that pushed her over the edge that night.
I'm not a fan of the whole contract plot line for Gabi and Li. It feels extremely degrading, where Li basically made the "you should smile more" schtick a binding legal document. No one made Gabi sign it, so I don't feel specifically bad for her. I just don't enjoy watching it from a basic level.
I do -- however -- LOVE the idea of Gabi partnering with another fashion line to create something new. That shows Li actually sees what makes Gabi happy. And it opens up a pathway for another business in town to compete with Titan or DiMera.
HOT
Easiest hot ever -- DAYS was renewed for two more years! Limoncello shots and bowls of chowder all around!
NOT
I love Wendy. From the second she arrived, she had this strong personality that didn't suffer fools. She shot down both Tripp and Joey in Beyond Salem because she didn't want to deal with that nonsense drama. Let's get back on that path! I like Wendy as the cool cat, and men trip over themselves to be better for her -- not the matronly presence who scolds men when they've misbehaved. "You knew this was wrong, or you wouldn't have kept this from me. What do we have if I can't trust you?!" Jiminy Christmas. Two dates. You've been on two dates. Wendy doesn't need to be raising men. Men need to raise themselves up to her level.
LINE OF THE WEEK
Gwen: "We got completely bolloxed."
I didn't know the word "bolloxed," and now I do. I feel better for it!
LINE OF THE WEAK
Alex: "Now, I'm trying not to blow my inheritance!"
Gosh, Alex. How terrible for you! I admire you for holding it all together in the face of this challenge. How ever do you find strength?
RANDOM THOUGHTS
Belle is probably the first soap character in history to declare that justice will do her no good.
I cheered for a different reason when Gwen ripped off Alex's terrible patterned shirt. Thank you, Gwen. Love, The Fashion Police.
Now, the Fashion Police can go after Nicole and her big, bold prints.
Paul said he and Andrew broke up because of "logistics," which is kind of the core reason for every breakup. People not being in the same space -- metaphorically or physically. See, Paul is some sort of magical savant, right?
Hang on there, Li. Tripp -- a doctor who is responsible for literally saving lives -- needs to sleep in an actual bed.
Cheers to Gabi pointing out that Wendy can look out for herself.
Did you know they made long-sleeve hospital gowns? I didn't. All the ones I've had were short-sleeved.
I'm glad people are calling Stefan out on raping Abigail. Having E.J. be one of those people, though, is tough. Does Stefan know how Johnny was conceived?
Tripp confronted Johnny about stealing his badge and impersonating him to get lab results. I'm shocked that the Salem lab has such poor security.
I giggled when Lucas snarked about Megan, "How 'Salem' of her for her to appear to die!"
Am I at all shocked that on their first trip without their wives, both Steve and John forgot to pack something important? No. No, I am not.
Johnny and Nicole continue to have awkward scenes. I get a very Eve and J.J. vibe from these two.
Leo: "I thought Maggie Horton's skill set with baking cookies and butting into everyone else's business.". Me: "At least she knows how to bake cookies. She's got that up on you, Leo."
Peter Reckell looks great -- don't get me wrong. But the ageless beauty that is Lauren Koslow makes it even more difficult to remember that Kate is Bo's ex-mother-in-law.
Someone is going to break the faithfulness contract, but for some reason, I don't think it's going to be Gabi.
I smiled when Brady called Belle "Tink."
Does anyone watch Below Deck? Our Kate Roberts reminds me a ton of the real Kate Chastain. Or perhaps it's the other way around. Either way, both of these epic Kates have style and dry sass for days.
That's it for this week! Tony will be back next week to keep an attendance record of all the new faces who show up. We're going to have to set another seat at the Fourth of July picnic if we keep this up!
Laurisa
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